麻烦英语达人批改一篇英语作文（高三）

麻烦英语达人批改一篇英语作文（高三）
帮我看一下有什么错误,给我些建议.再打个分.
Caring for Children
In my country,most of people pay a lot of attention to babies and small children .some people give up their career in order to care their babies and small children attentively.others ask their parents to care for them .seldom children are sent to day care centers because most of parents prefer to look after r them by themselves even if they are very busy with their work.some parents send their children to swimming centers .there are professional swimmers and experienced teachers to teach them how to swim.children have many kinds of toys such as puzzles,bear dolls.they enjoy playing games with their friends like hide-and-seek.they are fond of singing songs when they are in high spirits .for example,two tigers,only mom is nice in the world.